An itchy butthole is one of the worst fates a dude can endure. You’re stuck between the unbearable sensation down below and the urge to publicly pick your butt to get sweet relief.
You blame many culprits, but it doesn't matter because you can't even name the enemy: pruritus ani.
That's right—there’s a scientific name for an itchy butthole. Pruritus ani means "itchy anus" in Latin, and according to the Cleveland Clinic it affects up to 5% of the population and is four times more likely to occur in men. The most common symptoms are chronic itching and red, irritated anal skin that flares up at night.
Pruritis ani creates a vicious circle of itchy hell because when you scratch your perianal area, it causes tiny anal fissures (tears) that also begin to itch, which cause you to scratch even more.
So, what exactly causes this terrible pox to wreak havoc on your third pit? And more importantly, how can you make it stop?
Keep reading, DUDE.
10 Causes of an Itchy Butthole
Anal itching can be triggered by anything from lackluster self-care to more serious medical conditions. Let's unpack 10 possible causes.
1. Aggressive Wiping
Overzealous wiping, especially with standard dry toilet paper, increases your odds of developing Polished Anus Syndrome, characterized by a blotchy, red, irritated, or even bloody b-hole.
2. Not Wiping Enough
On the opposite end of the spectrum, half-hearted wiping leaves fecal matter festering around your anal area for hours. You might think you're saving money by skimping on toilet paper, but you pay the price with a chronically itchy butthole (not to mention skid marks in your underwear).
3. Butt Sweat
Also known as swamp ass, a sweaty butt is a recipe for an itchy butt. When heat and moisture get trapped in your underwear, it turns into a breeding ground for bacteria, leading to a chronic itchy sensation.
You can prevent swamp ass with body powder, moisture-wicking underwear, or going in for a mid-day maintenance wipe.
4. Spicy Food
Capsaicin, the compound in many spicy foods, can't be fully digested by humans. Accordingly, traces will come while pooping, hence the dreaded spicy butt. You'll have to decide for yourself whether a four-alarm fire in your pants is worth the plate of hot wings.
Other foods known to induce an itchy anus include citrus fruit, coffee, chocolate, and alcoholic beverages.
5. Hemorrhoids
Hemorrhoids are swollen, inflamed blood vessels in the anal area or rectum. Symptoms include chronic itching, painful bowel movements, and blood when wiping. If you've got hemorrhoids, warm water, and moisturizing soap will be your best friends until they clear up.
Pro tip: ditch your two-ply and grab some DUDE Wipes Medicated with Witch Hazel.
6. Tight Underwear
According to Harvard Health, people who routinely wear tight-fitting underwear (like tighty whities) are more prone to experience an itchy butthole.
7. Contact Dermatitis
Your laundry detergent, body wash, or ball deodorant could have artificial dyes or irritants that cause an allergic reaction or contact dermatitis, a skin condition characterized by a red rash and itching.
Switching to natural products without parabens or artificial colors will likely do the trick.
8. Skin Conditions
Disorders like psoriasis and atopic dermatitis (eczema) can certainly cause your butt to itch. However, these conditions typically manifest themselves on several parts of the body, not just the anal area.
9. Infections and Parasites
Although rare, stuff like scabies, pinworms (common amongst kids), pediculosis, and yeast infections, can all cause an itchy butthole—but you’ll likely experience other symptoms too.
10. Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs)
Anal itching can be a symptom of several STDs, including Human Papillomavirus (HPV), anal warts, anal herpes, gonorrhea, or pubic lice. If you think you fall into this camp, stop scratching and get help from a healthcare professional.
11. Rectal Health Conditions
Localized conditions like skin tags, rectal fistulas, anal fissures, and (rarely) anal cancer have itching as a symptom but are usually accompanied by more severe side effects.
Anal leakage and fecal incontinence are additional culprits that you should talk to your doc about. Common symptoms include gas, bloating, constant diarrhea, and constipation.
5 Ways to Relieve Your Itchy Butthole
Most of the time, an itchy butthole will resolve itself within a day or two. But if you can’t stop scratching, try these home remedies.
1. Shower Every Day
Showering daily removes the dirt, sweat, grime, and bacteria that build up in your butt crack. This is especially important in the summer months or if you exercise frequently.
Also, you have to actually wash your butt. You can’t expect a few trickles of water to clean out the nastiest crevice of your body. Get in there, dude.
2. Use Wipes Instead of Toilet Paper
Wiping your butt with dry toilet paper is a surefire way to exacerbate an itchy bottom. Just when the skin begins to heal, you go in and scratch it up with glorified sandpaper, creating a vicious cycle.
Make the switch to DUDE Wipes—they’re infused with aloe vera and vitamin E for soothing relief. Better yet, try DUDE Wipes Medicated with witch hazel for extra strength relief.
Speaking of wiping, make sure you’re wiping your butt properly. Some of you dudes are neglecting some key techniques.
3. Try New Soap or Laundry Detergent
If you have sensitive skin, switch to natural soaps and laundry detergents without dyes and fragrances. These will be gentler on your nether regions, sparing you from the unending agony of an itchy butthole.
4. Wear Sweat-Wicking Underwear
If you're wearing the same disgusting cotton underwear you've worn since high school, you're basically asking for an itchy butt. With all that sweat that accumulates down there, you need underwear that can keep your third pit dry.
DUDE Boxer Briefs are spun with silver ions that fight bacteria, so you don't have to fight swass and stank.
5. Apply a Topical Ointment
Zinc oxide and hydrocortisone cream are both commonly used to treat temporary skin irritation. They’re available over-the-counter for a few bucks at your local drugstore or grocery store.
When to See a Doctor About Your Itchy Butthole
Having an occasional butthole itch is normal; it happens to the best of us. However, if the itchiness becomes a chronic "thing" or you have other symptoms like bleeding, fever, or a rash that spreads, it’s time to call a dermatologist.
You've got a day to crush. The last thing you need is an itchy butt to throw you off your game.
