"But lean a little bit closer see that roses really smell like poo-poo-oo." - “Roses” Outkast
The time has finally come. You’ve been dating for a while. Your significant other is taking a shower, but you are about to explode if you don’t get on a toilet stat.
What do you do? Could this be the first time you poop in front of your partner?
We’ve already explained why holding it isn’t a good idea. Do you run to the nearest public bathroom? Drop it in the kitty litter and blame on the cat?
Or do you embrace this awkward moment and kindly ask if you can interrupt their bathroom routine to drop a deuce?
Most people would rather die than do this. But there is a strong contingent who have gotten over pooping together. In fact, Dollar Shave did a survey and found that 17 percent of people poop in front of their significant other at least once a week.
Some people take this to the extreme, like the Redditor who revealed he sits on his girlfriend’s lap while she goes because she doesn’t like going to the bathroom alone at night.
Some people won't even fart, let alone poop, at their partner's place, at least in the beginning of the relationship.
According to the Healthline survey, more than 28% of men and 22% of women said they would wait between one and three months to poop at their partner's place.
Some people even have rules like not pooping at your significant other’s place until you’re 6 months in.
If you are one of those people who are a bit timid and embarrassed about going number two in front of a romantic partner, we have some good news for you.
A few Google searches will reveal that the only people who seek out answers on this topic are the ones who are terrified of having bowel movements in front of their partner. The rest of us just deal with the partner pooping question as it arises.
If you can’t stand the idea of exposing your bodily functions, there are a few ways to get over it. First, you can plug your ears with your fingers or put on headphones while you poop — for most people it’s noises they emit that terrifies them. Another trick is turning on the sink when you go to drown out the noise.
This shituation can actually be a good way to test your level of intimacy. When it comes to poop talk, Jeremy Glass from Thrillist has some sage wisdom:
"The poop conversation is a highly important catalyst that opens up a whole new world and catapults couples to a place of utter security, trust, and intimacy that most people only have with their best friends of siblings."
If your partner is cool and understand about any bathroom related fears you have, it’s a good signal that they’re a keeper. If they're grossed out even talking about it or start shit-shaming you, you should probably tell said shamer to hit the bricks.
And you don’t need to give the partner pooping topic anymore meaning than the act itself. All it shows is that you’re comfortable with your partner and ate something spicy for lunch and is currently suffering from spicy butt.
So if you have a special someone in your life who is a timid pooper, make sure you show them how much you care and have DUDE Wipes at the ready so they can seal the deal.
